Shopping with Nathan

The week before Easter I decided that if I was to find and purchase Easter dresses for the girls, I would have to take Nathan shopping with me. Now, this might not sound like a big deal. I do have four older children and have taken them all shopping with me many times with not too many horror stories to relate. Nathan is different. I would rather take all six children than Nathan by himself any day. Truly.
Anyway, the first day of shopping we survived. I limited our outing to two stores. I allowed him to try on shoes and choose a bag of Easter candy. We were only gone 2 hours and I was feeling really successful and a little over-confident in Nathan's abilities to handle shopping. I found and purchased dresses for 3 of the four girls. Only Elizabeth's dress to find.
The following day was a little rougher. We still only were gone 2 hours and only went to two stores. He didn't get to try on shoes, but he did get a cookie. It seemed like we were going to make it, but then when my back was turned for 2 seconds, he escaped the cart. At first, I sweetly called to him. I looked around the isles and under the clothes racks thinking he was enjoying his favorite game of hide & seek. After 10 minutes I started to worry. I asked a couple of people if they'd spied a little boy wandering around. I was ready to enlist the help of the employees and succumb to the humiliation of being a delinquent parent when I heard a faint giggle. I found Nathan standing on the center post of a clothes rack next to where I was standing. I was unable to see his feet because they weren't on the ground. He thought this was super funny. I was ready to pass out from worry. I tried to secure him in his seat belt to keep him from disappearing again. The seat belt was broken. We left the store with him screaming, "I hate you! I want a different Mommy!" I realize so far this isn't unique to Nathan...just keep reading.
The 3rd day of shopping it decided to snow. Nathan refused to get dressed. I would remove his pj's and dress him. He would strip and put his pj's on again. I tried to excite him with promises of a fun adventure. He adamantly refused to be persuaded. I decided to take him to the store in his jammies. We arrived at the store. He unwillingly was put into the cart. He had a determined scowl, but wasn't crying or screaming so I still felt hopeful. Upon entering the inviting automatic doors, Nathan spied his first victim, an older woman happy and cheerful. He pointed at her, while screaming, "Stop looking at me! I don't like you! You are a mean lady!!!" As she cowered, two other woman witnessing this spectacle started to laugh. Nathan pounced. He began to scream while pointing, "Why are you laughing at me?" "Mom, those ladies want to steal me!" "Help me!" Seriously. I had only made it in the store 5 feet. I decided to make a quick dash to the girls dresses. I smiled as kindly as I could to the women as I passed. I sensed Nathan's sense of victory as he saw the woman stare blankly as we passed. No one was laughing or smiling. I was determined to not let Nate beat me. I was encouraged when he smelled popcorn and began to beg for some. I made a deal. It worked. We left the store only offending half of the patrons. I decided to quickly dart into another store next door since Nathan seemed a little happier. Wrong move. He was good in the store for the total of 2 minutes in took me to realize they too had sold out of dresses. Unfortunately, leaving the store was the problem. He took off running around a corner. I had Rilla in her car seat and was unable to break out into a good sprint. I yelled for him to come back. Only the faint laughter was his response. The wind whipped my hair about and dirt into my eyes. Contacts and wind are incompatible. Rilla started to cry as her blankets were not staying put. People in their cars were pulling over, rolling their windows down to politely inform me that my son was running wildly and then criticize me for allowing him to be on his own. Lucky for me, Nate let his guard down. While his back was turned, I'd caught up to him, scooped him with my free arm and hauled him back to the van. His kicking and screaming were nothing compared to the snow and nasty wind. Shopping for dresses truly was not that important.
Elizabeth happily went shopping with me on Saturday afternoon. She settled on a skirt and blouse. I am happy the shopping is over and have recommitted to remaining a shut-in until Nathan goes away to college.